ByMichelle Siouty, writer at

Sarah Silverman is incredibly brave, but not only for the reasons you may think. Sure, she isn't afraid to make a complete fool of herself and she isn't a lady who shies away from making incredibly disgusting potty jokes.

But she is a brave individual who openly discusses her daily battle with depression.

Not only that, but she happened to be a bedwetter into her teen years and felt such shame for it. Silverman discusses a particularly horrific memory of coming home after a particularly agonizing field trip in which she had to hide her embarrassing secret of bed-wetting from her classmates.

"My mom was there to pick me up, and she was taking pictures like a paparazzo. Seeing her made the stress of the last few days hit home, and something shifted inside me. It happened as fast as the sun going behind a cloud. You know how you can be fine one moment, and the next it's, 'Oh my God, I f---ing have the flu!?' It was like that. Only this flu lasted for three years."

Where once she was the hilarious class clown, Silverman retracted into an anxiety-ridden kid who stayed home from school and suffered from crippling panic attacks.

"Every breath is labored. You are dying. You are going to die. It's terrifying. And then when the attack is over, the depression is still there. Once, my stepdad asked me, 'What does it feel like?' And I said, 'It feels like I'm desperately homesick, but I'm home.' "

While Silverman still battles her depression every day, Silverman feels that she has a better hold of it with a little bit of medication and her ability to experience natural emotions.

"I've lived with depression and learned to control it, or at least to ride the waves as best I can. I'm on a small dose of Zoloft, which, combined with therapy, keeps me healthy but still lets me feel highs and lows."

She also feels that being open with her experiences has helped transform her comedy for the better. She believes that the dark times produce more honest work, which is therefore even funnier.

The most important lesson we can take it that Sarah refuses to let her depression hold her back in any way. While there may be days where she'd rather not be onstage, she continually tells herself that these feelings are fleeting and will indeed pass.

[Source: People]


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