ByMarlon McDonald, writer at
Umm... are you going to drink that Skooma?
Marlon McDonald

Every year costumers up and down the country wrack their brains in attempt to figure out the most original, witty and sexy costumes for people to get wasted in, and rip when vigorously bobbing for the last apple in the barrel. Or bucket, depending on how you lead your life.

And there are countless options for good costumes out there in the wild. However, the 15 I bring you now are quite the opposite. Prepare your body and mind for 15 of the oddest sexy costumes you could be wowing friends and potential suitors with this All Hallows Eve:

1. Pizza Rat

Now you can be the sexy, pizza stealing rodent you've always wanted to be!

2. Sassy Raphael

Ruin your childhood and chances of ever being taken seriously in one swift move with the sassy Raphael!

3. Sexy Cat In The Hat

You stay in your hat now, you hear? And don't come out 'til the mental scars have healed.

4. Sexy Trash Monster Costume

FINALLY. Now you can look sexy and like a pile of crap at the same time!

5. Hamburger Thief Costume

So sexy, border control won't mind you smuggling meat across their precious lines in this nifty get up.

6. Special Ops Officer

Leave your skittles at home kids, cause this well toned creep is on the prowl and he looks ready to protect and serve the crap out of someone in the possession of sleeves.

7. Blue Orc Skin Suit

With a jaw that big, how did this Blue Orc angle his gaze accurately enough to tie up his genital area? Do orcs use mirrors?

8. Sushi

Because raw fish on seasoned rice is the first sexy costume idea that pops into your head.

9. Sexy Lady

They just straight up ran out of ideas... or they're trying to avoid copyright infringement with the producers of Pretty Woman.

10. Naked Sexy Man

I need your clothes, your boots and a better idea for a costume.

11. Sexy Bert & Ernie

Today's letter is S for nothing is sacred.

12. Cecil the Lion

Because it's never too soon.

13. Sexy Chicken

When you see it...

14. Ring Toss Costume

The hat really brings this outfit together.

15. Boy Sidekick

Boy I wonder who this is meant to be?


Donna T. Rumpshaker

Or in other words: the sexy Donald Trump. I think I'm staying in this Halloween.

(Sources: Yandy, Buzzfeed, Spirit Halloween, 3 Wishes)


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