Good news, vegetarians: You can still enjoy a little beef now and then, and you've got some of the world's most talked-about celebs to thank for it.
This was the year that seemingly everybody went off at one point or another, not least of all professional shadesmith Nicki Minaj, whose fondness for stirring the pot has made her the meme queen of 2015.
So without further ado, let's cast a side-eye over our shoulders at the 5 beefs, feuds and shadetastic dismissals that made this year so much fun.
5. "Channing Tatum does not like me"
The lowdown: Sometimes it's best not to meet your idols, as Alex Pettyfer discovered.
How'd it start? When the slightly successful British actor was cast in Magic Mike, MVP Channing Tatum (who Pettyfer had considered "an incredible influence") made his displeasure known, and on set Pettyfer kept a low profile, earning him a reputation for being standoffish...
Shots fired: Pettyfer then moved into an apartment owned by a friend of Tatum, got an allergic reaction to some dust (seriously), and moved out again without paying any rent. Here's what happened next in Alex's own words:
I all of a sudden got a very negative email from Channing - rightfully so. I really took that the wrong way, which I shouldn’t have … By the end of it, I just basically said ‘Fuck them. ‘I’m not dealing with this, and I’m not paying.'
I should have just paid, but he was looking for an excuse not to like me.
Who had the last word? Only one of these unreasonably handsome men was invited back for the sequel, and it wasn't Pettyfer. But considering how awful Magic Mike XXL was, you could say the Englishman had the last laugh...
4. "I suggest you calm your knickers"
The lowdown: Zayn Malik demonstrated his IQ. And the world laughed.
How'd it start? After breaking literally tens of hearts by leaving One Direction, notorious personality vacuum Zayn threw himself into firing burns at famous people on Twitter with more passion than he'd ever put into actually doing his job.
But when a comment about his ample riches caught Calvin Harris's eye, shit went south real quick...
Shots fired: After a few back-and-forths between the world's most successful DJ and the guy who used to have a career, Zayn wrapped things up with this devastatingly witty riposte:
Dentures, get it? Because Calvin Harris, 31, is like, ancient. Duh.
Who had the last word? Calvin kept it classy...
And that was that.
3. "I've done nothing but love and support you"
The lowdown: Taylor had bad blood with Nicki for literally 24 hours.
How'd it start? With a VMA drama, as so many of the great celeb beefs do in the 21st century. When Nicki called out the VMAs for snubbing black women with curves, Taylor misinterpreted the tweet as a personal attack.
Shots fired: Nicki kept her cool, using further tweets to lament the fact that "black women influence pop culture so much but are rarely awarded for it".
Who had the last word? Taylor graciously apologized, and the two women signified that they'd put their brief beef behind them by opening the show together. Nicki, though, had another "bitch" in her sights...
2. "Miley, what's good?"
The lowdown: Responsible for the years single most quotable slice of shady pie in Nicki's now-iconic "Miley, what's good?".
How'd it start? This beef began cooking when Nicki made her distaste at Anaconda not being nominated for Video of the Year at the VMAs known in the press, claiming the snub was rooted in racial prejudice.
Shots fired: Miley objected to Nicki's objection, telling the New York Times: "If you want to make it about race, there's a way you could do that. But don't make it just about yourself."
And then the ceremony came around, and the rest is history...
Even pro gifbomber Rebel Wilson is all oh no she dihn't!
Who had the last word? Nicki, speaking to the New York Times in October:
"You're in videos with black men, and you're bringing out black women on your stages, but you don't want to know how black women feel abut something that's so important? Come on, you can't want the good without the bad."
1. "Is that a world tour or your girl's tour?"
The lowdown: You come at the King, you better not miss, so the saying goes.
How'd it start? First, a bit of history: Nicki Minaj and Drake are label-mates and old friends whose frequent displays of flirtation have had fans of both artists questioning the status of their relationship for years. The Anaconda video only fanned the flames...
Nicki, though, has been with rapper Meek Mill a while, and he and Drake used to be cool - until Meek tweeted this out of the blue back in July:
Shots fired: Drake responded immediately with the killer diss track 'Back to Back'. The freestyle drops truth bomb after truth bomb, brilliantly referencing the fact that Meek Mill was Nicki's supporting act on her Pinkprint world tour with the lyric: "Is that a world tour, or your girl's tour?" - implying, accurately, that Meek is piggybacking off his woman's popularity. Here's the diss in full:
And then the world waited for Meek's response. And waited. And waited... and whilst Meek tried and failed to get his ass into gear, Drake performed Back to Back at OVO Fest.
Who had the last word? Seriously? That applause is the sound of a thousand nails being hammered into Meek's coffin.
The sheer brutality of Drake's counter-attack, the hilarity of watching Meek flounder, plus the thought of Nicki sat at home reading the Weak Meek memes and wondering if she chose the wrong man make Drake vs. Meek the undisputed celebrity feud of 2015.