ByAutumn Henderson-Brazie, writer at Creators.co
Nerd in every respect.
Autumn Henderson-Brazie

Since the world's most powerful superheroes will be squaring off in Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice and Captain America: Civil War coming in 2016, I thought I would set the stage for what would be eight absolutely improbable but totally awesome battles between my favorite male badasses. My female match ups can be found here.

I have my own opinions on who would win, but I'd like to hear yours. Make your picks and/or tell me why in the comment section. In the coming weeks, I will tally the votes from this article and the female version and create a coed winner's bracket. So make sure to vote and stay tuned!

1. Max Rockatansky vs. Major William Cage

Tom Hardy/Tom Cruise
Tom Hardy/Tom Cruise

I started my female edition out with a battle between the leading ladies of Mad Max: Fury Road and Edge of Tomorrow, so I thought I'd do the same here, this time with the male protagonists.

Both men are fighting for their lives in post-apocalyptic scenarios. Cage (Tom Cruise) must defeat a highly intelligent alien race while Max (Tom Hardy) is pitted against the worst of his fellow man.

Cage is the kind of guy who's best after learning from his mistakes. Without the safety net of another life to fall back on, though, I'm not sure Cage would be victorious in a hand to hand fight.

Poll

Who do you think would win?

2. Mark Watney vs. Cooper

Matt Damon/Matthew McConaughey
Matt Damon/Matthew McConaughey

In The Martian, botanist Mark Watney (Matt Damon) was marooned on Mars and had to somehow survive on a planet where "nothing grows". In Interstellar, ex-NASA pilot Cooper (McCounaughey), is tasked with exploring other galaxies in hopes of saving the human race from extinction.

Both high stakes. Both perform admirably under pressure. This would be a close one. My opinion is a bit skewed because Damon also appeared in Interstellar as a marooned astronaut and his interaction with McCaunaughey's character did become violent. Ultimately, Cooper is fueled by his love for his children (especially Murph), and if a black hole couldn't keep them apart, I doubt that he would let any mere mortal get in the way of being reunited with them.

Poll

Who do you think would win?

3. Alejandro vs. Chris Kyle

Benicio Del Toro/Bradley Cooper
Benicio Del Toro/Bradley Cooper

When I say "Chris Kyle" I am referring to the version that Bradley Cooper portrayed in the film American Sniper, and mean no disrespect to the memory of the man himself.

Alejandro was the name of Benicio Del Toro's character in the recent thriller, Sicario.

Although Alejandro is highly skilled and cold of heart, I don't think that he could compete with The Legend.

Poll

Who do you think would win?

4. Captain James T. Kirk vs. Han Solo

Chris Pine/Harrison Ford
Chris Pine/Harrison Ford

I chose the Chris Pine iteration of Kirk because he is, to quote Derek Zoolander, "ridiculously good looking".

Both Kirk and Solo are handsome, cocky smart-asses...who also happen to captain space vessels. The question is not so much "who would win?" but rather, "who would shoot first?"

Poll

Who do you think would win?

5. Batman vs. Iron Man

Batman. That is all.

Poll

Who do you think would win?

6. Dexter Morgan vs. Patrick Bateman

Both are fit, good-looking, relatively young men. Both are hiding a very dark secret (or dark passenger, if you will). Patrick (Christian Bale, American Psycho) functions as a successful, extroverted playboy in the daylight, while Dexter (Michael C. Hall, Dexter) is by all appearances an intelligent, introverted family man. When the sun goes down, though? They stray from their daily lives in favor of their murderous passion.

I think Dexter's calculating nature (pre-Rita's death, I mean) gives him the upper hand.

Poll

Who do you think would win?

7. James Bond vs. Jason Bourne

Daniel Craig/Matt Damon
Daniel Craig/Matt Damon

This is the second extremely close match up that I've included a Damon character in. I think the only true way to break this thing would be either to let your personal bias for one of these legendary agents take over, or to wait and watch it play out on screen. Since option B is never going to happen, I'll have to incorporate my biases, and I've learned to never bet against a Matt Damon character.

Poll

Who do you think would win?

8. Hannibal Lecter vs. John Doe

Mikkelson/Hopkins & Spacey
Mikkelson/Hopkins & Spacey

I saved the most chilling, and possibly most interesting, battle for last.

I'm sure I share the opinion with many that Hannibal Lecter is the greatest "villain" (I like to think of him as more of an anti-hero) of all time. The Silence of The Lambs was, of course, my first introduction to the good doctor, and Hopkins' portrayal is THE classic. However, Mads Mikkelson's version in the television show Hannibal was so inspired that it felt rude not to include him in this, and since whenever feasible, one should try to eat the rude, I figured I would morph their faces just to make sure all of my bases were covered.

While Hannibal is my favorite on-screen serial killer, Kevin Spacey's John Doe from Se7en is the one I'm most frightened of. Thank goodness this is Hannibal's battle and not mine. I foresee a wicked game of chess ensuing between these two characters that would ultimately end in John's respectful demise at the hands of Dr. Lecter and a feast fit for a king to follow.

Poll

Who do you think would win?

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