Recently I embarked on a mission not of my choosing, but simply being stuck with family members, I felt I had the obligation to defend Star Wars: The Force Awakens. If you're like me, you love that movie, but with some aunts and uncles (a flippin' father) claiming it was A New Hope rip-off, i had work to do.The odds were 4 to 1, not in my favor, yet I tried. I did not defend Star Wars' well, do you think they cared if it was a StarKiller, not a Death Star? Then my father went off and asked why would Batman be battling Superman? They're both heroes, and it just doesn't make sense. Then my cousin came down, she is my age, and agreed with my father, it doesn't make sense.
I should stop, and just walk away from this laborious conservation, this is the Kobayashi Maru (a lose,lose situation). So I said excuse me for a minute, I went outside to get my calm-on! As I walked in hoping that the fever has died down, the audience has grown since five minutes ago. First I compared Superman and Putin, stating that they're both extremely powerful, and Batman is like the United States. He is worried that he will be left unchecked and could do whatever he wants. Right after this was mention, a roar of NO, NO, NO, Superman is a hero, how dare you compare him to Putin. So the next logical question is to ask if they have seen the Man of Steel? Surprisingly everyone has, except my father.
Instead of starting off explaining why DC's biggest names are battling, I asked if they have heard of a certain mercenary with a mouth. So i explained that he has cancer, and he is worried about his stripper girlfriend. He joins a program to cure his cancer,like the one Wolverine was in, gains a healing factor, and must save his girlfriend from that same program. Everyone in the room thought, oh that sounds really interesting (yes I left out the 4th wall breaking, that it was Rated R, and chimichangas,) and they asked when does it come out? Right now I feel like Sisyphus, and wishing the boulder would end this conversation.
I asked my three main antagonists (My father,aunt,uncle), what was their favorite movie? The answers were Saving Private Ryan (father), The Godfather (uncle), Annie Hall (aunt), and this left me wishing I ignored my impulse to ask this question. Right now I am thinking is there a way to make Dawn of Justice seem interesting to people who disliked Star Wars? I do admit my curiosity is piqued, due to the fact that I hang out with people who spend hours discussing possible Game of Thrones theories ( I've read the books, and it is impossible not to).
I asked if they remembered the damage that Superman caused at the end of Man of Steel? I told them that Gotham was a sister city next to Metropolis, like New York and New Jersey.Bruce Wayne witnessed this devastation, and came out of retirement to show the world that Superman was not invincible. Lex Luthor shares Bruce's xenophobia of Clark being a powerful alien, and he must be supervised (I showed them the trailer with Doomsday, I needed help!).
This trailer did nothing to my unholy trinity of relatives. I absconded to the refrigerator for a refreshment, just wanting this to be over! I came back down and they asked me about Wonder Woman? I thought should I explain the fact that she is the daughter of Zeus, she hails from Themsyrica, and I did neither. In my head I am thinking, just look at Wikipedia, and just let me enjoy this 'refreshment'! I thought, all right this is Mike Jac, this is it, last try to explain to them what makes Batman v Superman so appealing!
Imagine reading the Godfather book at age ten, and having to wait twenty years before the movie came out. Imagine that in Annie Hall, Diane Keaton's role never occurred, and you've been waiting ever since. Imagine in Saving Private Ryan that the Americans were battling aliens! The unholy trinity looked at one another and said ' That sounds stupid,' and they walked away. This was not a book, and I had failed miserably. I rationalize that these people lacked the imagination to understand what a grand time it is to live in this era. Truth of the matter, I was frustrated at how these people could not understand the simple concept that heroes do not always agree. I drank many more refreshments, and my cousin came up to me and asked If I would accompany her to Batman V Superman, because she doesn't want to go alone. I told her yes, and I thought she was my Saving Private Ryan.