ByMCZDsalad, writer at

To start things off with a bang, or at least why follows one; Foodles Productions has recently come out and is bringing about criminal charges towards Pine Studios for the injury to Harrison Fords leg when a heat metal door from the Millennium Falcon slammed down on it, braking his leg. Pinewood Studios remains Star Wars’ production company and not much will probably come out of this, its not as if Disney is struck for money. In no way will this effect the production of Star Wars episode 8, the only thing that may come out of this that we could enjoy is Harrison Ford getting asked about it in every interview and thus carrying on his ‘I don’t care’ regime beyond his apparent space grave. Surely theres more danger in the world of Star Wars than a metal door.

One of the most confusing, original-ish and accent burning trailer has been released, Whiskey Tango Foxtrot (army talk for WTF, the slang for what the f*ck). Confusing because I don’t know what to expect the toe of this film is; is it an uplifting underdog story/ Is it a comedic Bruce Almighty style of underdog journalist with a hint of feminism and comedy? Is it a feminism comedy? The answer is: Fuck you, all the above. Thats right, I swore, if people can take what everyone wants from a film, mush it together and create a B-C list film, I can swear. Origional-ish because, mmmmffff is ones reaction to this, a clear plot, obvious hints of humour around sad scenes and some cool direction, it will be a good film, no doubt, but it will be a film. Nothing special. The accent burning description is an obvious one to explain; I spent the firs half of the trailer wondering whats going on with Margot Robbie’s accent, and wondering why Martin Freeman isn't being super awkward, does he even have an accent in the film? I’m going to watch it again. Re watched it, Freeman has some kind of Russian, Irish/American accent. Geez. From the directors of Focus; there is no doubt that Whisky Tango Foxtrot will be a great film and a fun time to watch, but rather forgettable.

*Sighs*, a new director has been found for the Playmobil movie, in the hands of ex animator Lino DiSalvo, the successful toy company is going to pull a Lego. Considering that Lino DiSalvo hasn't done legitimate directing before, although he has done great work with animation, being in charge of Frozen, Chicken Little and Tangled etc. there is a chance that this could become a massive flop, or it could be another Lego movie. Who knows, but to be honest, who cares. I do.

If this film is a flop; it will show that making films out of anything just doesn't work, thus causing Hollywood to shy away from such preposterous premises like a Pez movie, Tetris movie and even an emoji movie, we don’t need them, they don’t need the money, GET OVER IT HOLLYWOOD; YOU’RE OUT OF IDEAS. Likewise if the movie goes well then we will have to endure the threat of a movie about small sugar pill dispensers, but hey, angry birds look alright, so it may not be all that bad. With the rise of Lego movies; films based on physical PSF’s could bring about a new genre of film.

The end of awful horror films could be nigh. Piranha 3D writers Josh Stolberg and Peter Goldfinger have been hired to develop an eight instalment in the Saw series. This could enforce some originality and interior horror into horror films, suggesting that the internal mind is what brings about the true scare in good horror films. On the other hand, considering the amount legitimate philosophical horror in Piranha 3D, this could just be about 2 hours of CGI gore. It’s still early days however, and with hopefuls like The Belko Experiment (with screenplay by James Gunn) approaching in 2016 promising to see the end shock scare CGI-for-bait ‘horror’ films there is always hope.


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