ByKit Simpson Browne, writer at
Writer-at-large. Bad jokes aplenty. Can be gently prodded on Twitter at @kitsb1
Kit Simpson Browne

Now, Wolverine may be the best at what he does, but exactly what that entails has tended to vary depending on the context. In comic book form, Wolvie has evolved from the best curmudgeonly wild-man Marvel had going back in the '80s into the best headmaster the X-Men had available to them (and, latterly, the best deceased icon around). What's more, he was - at least until Deadpool rose to prominence - the very best outlet for mutant-themed ultra-violence in the Marvel universe.

In movie-form, though, things have always been a little different. With Wolverine's murder-rages having always been limited by the X-Men franchise's PG-13 template, we've grown used to Wolverine being the best at being a badass and surviving whatever's thrown at him, but not to him being the goriest mutant this side of Wade Wilson.

With Wolverine 3 now being tipped for an R-rating, though - that could all be about to change. And, as such, it seems about time to take a look at...

Seven Of The Goriest Moments In Wolverine's History (That We Could Now See On The Big Screen)

First up?

7. That One Time That The Punisher Literally Ran Wolverine Over With A Steamroller

Yup, that's right. As part of an elaborate plan to stop Wolverine from tracking him down, The Punisher once drove a steamroller onto Wolverine, and then just... kind of left it there.

Which - minus The Punisher himself, whose rights are with Marvel Studios - is exactly the sort of faintly ridiculous gore-mongering that we could well see in an R-rated Wolverine movie.

But, y'know, with added splatter.

Next up?

6. That Time We Watched Wolverine Be Torn Apart By A Nuclear Explosion

Otherwise known as 'what happens when Wolverine chases down a man who is basically just a walking bomb', a.k.a. the super-villain Nitro.

Now, The Wolverine gave us a glimpse of what happens when Wolverine is hit by the (indirect) force of a nuclear blast - but for all the close-up, skin-rending gory detail, we'd really need an R-rated reprise. Some sort of epic final act explosion, perhaps?

Another option?

5. That Time We Watched Wolverine Straight-Up Behead His Arch-Enemy

This one's a pretty easy sell.

Feature Sabretooth in the upcoming sequel. Have Wolverine and Sabretooth fight. Have Wolverine behead Sabretooth in visceral fashion. Collect money from repeat viewings from fans.


On a similar note?

4. That Time Wolverine Got Ripped In Half By The Hulk

Now, of course, The Hulk very much isn't going to show up in a Wolverine movie any time soon (since his rights are still very much with Marvel Studios), but some variation on the famous moment where the Ultimate Universe's green goliath yanked Wolvie's legs from his torso just might.

After all, there's no shortage of giant, hulk-like mutants who could be pressed into doing it - and there'd be no better way to establish a very different sort of Wolverine movie than by having it open with his guts being torn out...

Meanwhile, in a very particular Wolverine story, there's always...

3. That Time Wolverine Killed Pretty Much All Of The X-Men By Accident

Yup, that's right, we've finally arrived at fan-favorite comic book storyline Old Man Logan (long tipped to be the basis for Wolverine 3's plot).

Which, of course, featured Wolverine being tricked into brutally murdering the entire X-Men team. The odds of the movie paying for more than a handful of cameos seem pretty low, of course, but even that handful could make for a memorable (albeit horrifying) movie moment.

Of course, there're also some more budget-friendly options, including...

2. That Time Wolverine Ripped A Cow In Half

Which... is pretty much exactly what it sounds like.

Gore, gore and more gore... but with a farm country flavor.

And, of course, finally, there's...

1. That Time Wolverine Got Eaten By The Hulk (And Tore His Way Out)

Once again, there's no chance we'll actually see the Hulk play his part in this one - but were, say, The Blob to turn up at some point, it's not impossible that we might see him eat Logan... and then suffer the ultimate form of indigestion.

Or, y'know, the movie'll just feature a little more swearing and stabbing than usual, and a couple of nude scenes.

What do you think, though?


Just how R-rated would you like Wolverine 3 to be?


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