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So Gods Of Egypt, a movie that as soon as I saw the first trailer, I knew it was going to be garbage. Was I wrong? Well I said I knew so yeah it was.

Brief Spoiler Free Summary

In an alternate Egypt where the world is flat and the Egyptian Gods live among humans, a thief named Bek must team up with the god Horus to save his love and save the world from Set, the god of Darkness. Pretty generic movie plot besides the whole Earth is flat thing.

The Characters

Before we begin discussing the characters I have to talk about the controversy about the cast. This film takes place in ancient Egypt but most (if not all) of the main and supporting cast are white. Which... yeah that's pretty screwed up. It reminds me a lot of the "Avatar: The Last Airbender" controversy and I'm surprised people didn't learn from that awful film.

Bek is played by Brenton Thwaites ("Maleficent", "Oculus", "Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales") and oh boy this guy. Bek is a special kind of character because never in my life have I seen such a dull, boring, idiotic character in a fantasy movie. I was never rooting for him the entire time because of how boring he was and if you can't root for the hero then the movie is doing something wrong.

Gerard Butler ("Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life", "How to Train Your Dragon", "300") plays Set, the god of darkness and the main antagonist of the film. He's one of the many reasons why this film reminds me of a crappier version of "300"...since he played King Leonidas in "300". Now is he crap in this film? Yup. However I'll say this, he's nowhere near as bland and boring as Bek and the other characters and is probably the best character in the film...even though he's still crap.

Horus is played by Nikolaj Coster-Waldau ("Black Hawk Down", "Game of Thrones", "Oblivion") and like Bek is really bland and boring. He's not as boring and bland as Bek but he's close. Horus will sometimes might show some hint at being really cool but never really being really cool. Overall he's just one of the many boring, bland and generic characters in this film.

Finally we have Zaya played by Courtney Eaton ("Mad Max: Fury Road" and that's it). I feel really bad for Courtney Eaton because through her and the rest of the film's clunky acting and dialogue, I can tell she's a good actress. She was pretty damn good in "Mad Max: Fury Road" so it pains me to say she's pretty awful in this like everyone else. I just hope she continues having good films like"Mad Max: Fury Road" because I would like to see her in more things.

The CGI and Action

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So if there's one thing I can say is good...or mediocre is the action and CGI. Egypt looks beautiful and most of the monsters/creatures looks really cool. For example the fire breathing snake monsters are really cool...but then we have a sphinx who looks kinda like a gorilla. Yeah it's pretty bad. How about the action, is that any good? Meh. The action in this film relies on CGI and for the most part it's done decently. However the fight scenes in this movie are very similar to films like "Clash of the Titans", "Wrath of the Titans", and "Immortals" and those films do the fight scenes better (although the Titans remake series does it only a little better) so if you want better fight scenes go watch those. Oh god did I just tell someone to watch the "Clash of the Titans" reboot series? On second thought go watch "Immortals".

The Cons

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Almost everything. The dialogue is clunky and over the top at some parts, the characters are bland and boring, the CGI can be good at times but at other times be awful and the story is generic as all hell. There is so much wrong with this film that it almost hurts.

The Verdict

This film is awful. It's dull, boring, clunky, idiotic and has a pretty big controversy. This film for some strange reasons gives me a lot of "300" vibes, but unlike "300" which was decent, this film is just disgustingly bad. Don't see this movie, don't even think about it. Go watch any other film.

Thanks for reading, next time I'll be uploading a blog ranking all eight of the Star Wars films (yes I'm including the terrible Clone Wars film from 2008) and then a review of "10 Cloverfield Lane". Once again, thanks for reading, please be civil in the comments below.


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