ByTom Cox, writer at Creators.co
Staff writer for Moviepilot. Tweet me @thomascox500
Tom Cox

Directors are strange creatures by nature. The human centipede Tom Six brought writhing and shitting into the world - in not one or two but three movies - proves he's got a bit of a weird streak, but this other one he created may make him even weirder.

What the F**k was a peculiar early movie by the Dutch 42-year-old, which you almost definitely haven't seen because it only showed initially in the Van der Valk hotels in the Netherlands a year before Human Centipede: First Sequence in 2008.

However, it is now available on DVD via the Six Entertainment Company. Hooray!

Source: Six Entertainment
Source: Six Entertainment

What the F**k lives up to its name. It follows the kidnap of a successful Dutch singer, Dries Rolevink (playing himself), by his biggest fans - an overweight caravan-dwelling couple.

They are desperate for a baby and want the sperm of the star, whose music sounds like Barney's theme tune mashed up with the 28 Days Later soundtrack. Dries must stay with them as a captive until the woman is pregnant. Sounds like a Dutch pop version of the Fritzl case.

The Dutch-language picture is not a horror in the same league as the poop chain by any stretch, but a black comedy that definitely delves into some dark regions.

None of his first three movies - the other two being Honeyz (2007) and Gay in Amsterdam (2004) - made much of an impact relatively, but they are interesting for shedding light on the curious mind of Six.

Source: Six Entertainment
Source: Six Entertainment

For the bargain of $24.99 (with free shipping) you can own a signed DVD of Dries' debacle with English subtitles. I can't help feeling Six's scrawl over this tagline indicates some inexplicable inner fear:

"They don't want his autograph. They want his sperm.".

Get weird with the trailer for "the best Dutch film ever made":

Source: via Bloody Disgusting

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