ByNerdTranslation, writer at Creators.co
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Ok, tonight's SHIELD was over-all a good episode. It had some flaws mind you, but their was a serious cool factor that smoothed them over. Here's a spoiler-ific sum up of tonight's SHIELD, plus what you need to know for next week!

Season 3 Episode 16: Paradise Lost

Malick (Gideon Malick that is. Not the girl one, and not the '70s one.) is super freaked. The hobo Inhuman showed him his death and it's apparently at the "hands" of Hive (AKA Ward, AKA Will, AKA Malick's Brother, AKA Malick's SPOILER ALERT Daughter, AKA Some Astronauts, AKA Some Guys from the 1600s). Meanwhile, Coulson is also dwelling on Hive, specifically the fact that Ward, the man he killed for the wrong reasons, is Hive's current host, which May has no solution for.

Coulson wants this handled, so he prepares the non-powered team to go after Iron Chef Inhuman (seeing that the "Iron Chef Chairman" is just an actor has pretty much ill-legitimized that show for me. THANKS SHIELD!) while Daisy and Lincoln go to not-Wolverine for some advice on Hive. (Suddently Lincoln has this guy who knows all about Hive? I warned you there were flaws!) After Daisy blows up all the mines in not-Wolverine's yard, Lincoln informs him that he will give him a terra-genesis crystal in exchange for all the info he has on Hive. Not-Wolverine found a steam-punk orb which Daisy says is Kree. (How does she know what Kree stuff looks like? Never mind, don't ask questions!) Lincoln and Daisy totally gyp not-Wolverine and take his precious and his steam-punk orb. (Poor not-Wolverine! What are his powers?! Tell us writers! Tell us now!)

On the flight back home, the only real flaw of the episode happened. Lincoln revealed that he had drinking problems which led to him almost killing his girlfriend. He was drunk, she got in the car with him to try and help him with his problem, then they hit a tree and Gordon showed up since he had been watching them Heimdal style. I have three questions: 1) Why did the caring girlfriend let Lincoln get in a car drunk? 2) Why did she also get in a car with a drunk driver? 3) Why didn't Gordon intervene before anyone got hurt? Lincoln could not have walked away unscathed. Why did Gordon just watch it happen?

Lincoln as a character is basically Inhuman Cyclops to me. He follows Daisy around spouting his anxt just like Cyclops does to Jean! Your a smart, strong, independent woman Daisy! Go all Pheonix on that dead weight!

While Daisy and Lincoln have a "sweet" moment, all of the normals are going after Iron Chef Inhuman. May kicks his manhood so hard that he falls to the ground. (Why don't more fights end in kicks to the kiwis? That should be everyone's go to move. Imagine if Daredevil just went around kicking guys between the legs? I might actually be more afraid of a vigilante like that than one with clubs and stuff. I'm just saying.) So they've got Iron Chef Inhuman in the containment cell which is apparently right where he wants to be because he breaks out, knocks everybody unconscious, and dive bombs the SHIELD plane, only to land in a Hydra base. Major credit to the CGI artists behind this episode. The plane scene was great, not to mention the Hydra meeting...

Hive collects all of the Hydra people, so that he can show them his true Hive form. We only see it from behind, but it seems pretty accurate and tentacle-y. After the rest leave, Hive faces Malick, whose past we've been glimpsing in flashbacks. Gideon DOES NOT practice what he preaches because he cheats his way out of the Hive sacrifice ceremony causing his brother to have to be assimilated by Hive. Isn't Hive the real problem here? If it wasn't for him, there would be no creepy Hydra human sacrifice cult at all!

Anyways, because Hive has Gideon's brother's memories, he decides to settle the Malick score, by kissing Malick's daughter, and then alien-worm-tongue-ing her to death! Comic book shows, how I love thee!

You think all of that's good? May is able to send out a distress signal to Daisy, who decides it's finally time to ASSEMBLE THE SECRET WARRIORS!!! YAAAAAASSSSS!!!

Burning Questions

Will Lincoln cry as much as Cyclops? God help us all.

What is the fate of the normals?

Will Alton Brown also play an Inhuman character? How about Bobby Flay?

Did Gideon somehow change his fate?

What We Actually Learned

Daisy doesn't know the identity of the Agent, in the Quinjet, in space.

Hive is actually very comic accurate.

THE SECRET FREAKING WARRIORS ARE COMING!!!

What did you think? What's your opinion on 'Paradise Lost'? Tell me in the comments!

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