Well it's official, Wolverine 3 is the next comic book movie to slap on an R rating and cover us in buckets of blood. In a trend bucked by this year's mega hit Deadpool, Hugh Jackman will be pulling out those adamantium claws for a (reported) final time in what promises to be a brutal outing. Not exactly a man known for his quiet approach, just what R-rated gore can we expect from Logan's next big screen outing? Here are the most gory stories to plague the X-Men's indestructible outlaw.
10. Happy Birthday (Wolverine Vol. 2, Issue 10)
Wolverine and Sabretooth have always had a troublesome relationship, but at least Sabe always remembers Wolverine's big day. After killing Wolverine's lover Silver Fox, Sabretooth returns every year to remind Wolverine of everything he has lost. Often taking a brutal beating, Wolverine doesn't even have the time to open his cards. Don't worry, though, the story has a happy ending. When Sabretooth becomes the "invisible" ruler of East Asia, Wolverine crashes the party, delivering some swift justice:
"Happy birthday, from your old pal Wolverine."
It is the thought that counts! If this storyline was to weave its way into Wolverine 3, it is a surefire way to ensure some quality Liev Schreiber screen time!
9. A Cross To Bear (Uncanny X-Men, Issue 251)
As far as religious iconography goes, this one cuts pretty close to the bone. A crucified Wolverine is left to go mad in the Australian outback at the mercy of the elements. Back in the late '80s the X-Men team left Westchester for a trip Down Under. In-between the many prawn-filled barbecues, we are introduced to a group called the Reavers — cybernetically enhanced mercenaries who work for Logan's frenemy Lady Deathstrike. The Reavers tie Wolverine to a cross and leave him for dead in the Aussie desert. Being an indestructible man, Logan doesn't starve, but instead he sees various hallucinations featuring the likes of Sabretooth. Better late than never, Jubilee turns up to free Wolverine and the two set out on their bromance adventures that dominated the '90s comics.
8. Daddy Issues (Uncanny X-Force — Final Execution)
Rule No. 1: If you are one of Wolverine's kids, then get the hell outta town. Logan fought a group called the Red Right Hand, ordinary humans who had been wronged by Wolverine in some way. When he found their hideout he brutally slaughtered each one of their mutant bodyguards, but not before the Red Right Hand had fatally poisoned themselves. Victory was bittersweet when a prerecorded message revealed that each of the slain bodyguards were in fact Wolverine's bastard children. In the Uncanny X-Force, Wolverine takes it one step further with his son Daken, who was leading the new Brotherhood of Evil Mutants, swearing that he would kill every student in Wolverine's care. Left with no other choice, Wolverine drowns Daken in a puddle, in an event that still haunts him to this day. If that wasn't psychologically damaging enough, the whole Daken story was masterminded by Sabretooth (and you thought his birthday presents were bad).
7. A Helping Hand (What If? Wolverine: Enemy Of The State)
Under the control of Hydra, Wolverine is nothing more than a Terminator-style puppet. After Logan carries out a string of superhero assassinations, enough is enough; a team made up of Captain America, Sue Storm, Magneto and Kitty Pryde hunts him down and attempts to take him out (easier said than done). A bloody battle leaves them all dead, bar Kitty Pryde. She launches a one-woman assault and plunges her arm through Wolverine's skull. He manages to chop off the arm, but not before Kitty turns it solid. You try living your life with an arm sticking out of your skull! Unable to heal, Wolverine keels over — stay outta my head.
6. Beetlejuice (Deadpool Kills Deadpool, Issue 3)
Another storyline that is unlikely to grace W3, but this one has to win the trophy for one of the more inventive deaths that has befallen Logan over the years. In Deadpool Kills Deadpool Issue 3 there is a showdown between the good and evil Deadpools in a multiversal war. Poolverine is offed in an odd homage to Brendan Fraser's The Mummy days, leaving nothing more than an adamantium skeleton. In an attempt to off the supporting Deadpool characters, the original Deadpool throws a grenade at Wolverine, but this isn't your standard issue explosive — it is filled with flesh-eating beetles. Bon appétit.
5. Wolverine Has The Munchies (Marvel Zombies)
At this point I would like to point out that it is highly unlikely this scene, let alone storyline, will ever make it to our screens — but one can hope. In the popular Marvel Zombies arc, the world population is infected by a deadly virus — think The Walking Dead. After being infected by Captain America, Hulk and Hawkeye, a zombie Wolverine then attempts to unsuccessfully attack the Silver Surfer. Due to decay, Wolverine's arm rips off, but the group eventually manages to defeat and devour Silver Surfer. After gaining his cosmic powers they turn on Galactus and become a super collective known as The Galactus.
4. 'Slay' Bells Ring (Old Man Logan)
With Old Man Logan currently the favorite to be the plotline for W3, it is unsurprising that the film has been slapped with an R rating. Alongside the death of his family and decapitating Red Skull with Cap's shield, Old Man Logan also had a rather gruesome end for the X-Men. Wolverine forces himself into exile after slaying the entire team at the mansion. When a group including Mr. Sinister, Sabretooth, Dr. Octopus, Omega Red and Bullseye attacks the mansion, it is up to Wolverine to protect the students. After a bloody battle and the last attacker falls, it turns out it was all an illusion created by Mysterio. A broken Wolverine stands in the midst of his fallen teammates' body parts. Even if Old Man Logan isn't the next route, we are going down the Batman v Superman, dystopian flash-forward vision to bring this scene to our screens.
3. Logan's Feeling Flat (Punisher, Issue 17)
Frank Castle and Logan sure share a colorful history, but when the two butted heads in the Punisher series, things were bound to get messy. Having given Wolverine a friendly warning and a shot to the knees, Punisher shoots off his pecker (ouch, guys), but realizes a man that can regenerate will soon be back on his feet. Still not content with stripping Wolverine of his manhood, Punisher then turns to a handily placed steamroller and goes full Wile E. Coyote. With the X-Man under a steamroller, his pleas with Castle are pointless — and Punisher takes great pleasure in finishing the job. Splat! It was part of Garth Ennis's nine-year run on Punisher and a classic of his style. Later, Ennis would turn his hand to the equally R-rated (and impending) The Boys series.
2. Hunger Pains (Old Man Logan)
You all remember the morbid childhood ending to Little Red Riding Hood, don't you? The alternative ending where she takes the woodcutter's ax and chops herself free from inside the wolf? Well the Old Man Logan storyline took a leaf out of that book. It is revealed that Hulk's grandchildren murdered Wolverine's family and in a game of tit for tat, Wolverine returns the favor. He comes face to face with Old Man Banner, who quickly flashes the green and defeats Wolverine. Devoured inside the giant Hulk, there is a true Alien chest-buster scene that goes down in comic book history. An enraged Logan uses his claws to rip himself free from the Hulk's stomach, leaving behind a rather colorful mess. Just seeing this come to life on screen is enough to warrant an R rating of its own.
1. Wolverine Is Half The Man He Used To Be — For 3.5 Years (Ultimate Wolverine Vs. Hulk)
If bursting out of Bruce Banner isn't gory enough for you, then how about a serious case of having a "split personality"; one that would leave Wolverine literally in pieces for the next three-and-a-half years. In 2005 Damon Lindelof's Ultimate Wolverine vs. Hulk saw Nick Fury recruit Wolverine to take out Hulk, who had been tracked to Tibet. Issue 1 had Wolverine ripped apart like a pearl necklace, but Issue 2 was struck with delays and remained unpublished for several months. If dragging your intestines up a Tibetan mountain wasn't bad enough, the third issue didn't come out until May 2009. We know the Lost writer was a fan of a cliffhanger, but a third of a decade? C'mon, Lindelof!
So there we have it. More Hulk-tearing, claw-slicing action than you can shake a stick at.
Could this really be Logan's final time in the ring? Marvel has already said that Iron Man dies with Robert Downey Jr., and it is difficult to see anyone else stepping into Hugh Jackman's metal-lined boots. Wolverine has had his skeleton eradicated more times than Professor Xavier has had school dinners, so let's never say never. Whatever the outcome of Wolverine 3, polish those claws because it's going to be a bloody mess.