BySam Plank, writer at
"You have to be what you are. Whatever you are, you gotta be it." -Johnny Cash. Tweet a tweeter at my twitty twitter, @tw1tterintw1t
Sam Plank

We all have our least favorite superhero costume from the movies, including, but most definitely not limited to:



And everybody in this movie-

But what about their comic book counterparts? The comics have had over 80 years to get the costumes wrong, as opposed to movies, when Zorro first appeared on our televisions in 1920.

And boy, have the comics REALLY gotten some costumes wrong!

The Bombastic Bag-Man & The Amazing Bag-Man

When Spider-Man loses his symbiote suit, he's got a choice: he can go web-slinging nekked, or he can improvise. Since Reed Richards helped him get his alien suit off, of course Mister Fantastic helped him out! He gave him a spare F4 costume laying around, and Peter used a paper bag as a mask.

Handy, cheap, and he could go grocery shopping when he was done fighting crime!

Purple Nurple Hawkeye

Some of these entries you can write off as being a product of the good ole days, when writers had slightly different tastes than they have now. But still...this is way too much purple for a badass like Hawkeye!

Holy Nonsense, Batman!

Zebra, various colors, rainbow and mummy. All of the suits had backstories, usually involving encounters with bad guys, but some of these get-ups should never have made it to the store shelves.

Thor in a midriff

Silly superhero, midriffs are for girls! And the girly men out there. Not for Norse thunder gods that carry around big ass hammers!


I'm one of the many, many Flash fans who are lovin' Carlos Valdez's take on Vibe, a.k.a. Cisco Ramon, but the early version of Vibe in the comics rocked the parachute pants...and by 'rocked' I mean 'should have never left the house looking like that.'

Who would like to see Cisco looking like this?



Iron Cap

Who would have thought a supersoldier serum that gave you superduperpowers would have side effects? Well, apparently it did with Captain America for one whole issue, paralyzing him Thankfully, he had Tony Stark as a friend, and he had a new whiz-bang suit to tide him over until the Red Skull cured him.

Wait, what?

Even though he needed the suit to function, hopefully, in the future, all the physical and moral armor Cap needs is his trusty shield and his intolerance for swear words.

Kitty Pryde as Sprite

Different? Yes. Snazzy and stunning? Not so much! The mask, the socks...pretty much every piece of this costume screams obscenities.

Sue Storm: Cut! It! Out!

No, actually, don't cut it out. I'm all for cleavage, but holy crap, cutting the 4 out of the chest of her costume? Oy vay.

That kind of thing only works with cosplay-

Notice the Thing's underwear during the same time period:

That gets him an honorable mention!

Whose horrific comic costume did I miss? Let me know with a comment, or maybe mail me a letter...just don't cut out all the letters. Writing is just fine!


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