Fun fact about me: I used to work at Disney World. Granted, it was only for a semester when I was in college, but it's still something that seems to surprise people when they learn of it. But every day for a semester, I headed to the Disney-MGM Studios, donned a costume, and played with guests all day.
Most of the time, it was fantastic. It was truly maybe the best four months of my life. But other times...
Let's just say that I've done many service-oriented jobs in my life, and I'm not sure I've ever gotten weirder (and sometimes, dumber) questions than I did when I worked for Disney. Here were some of my favorites — and yes, I got asked every single one of these more than once, so if you're sitting there saying, "Oh, but it was just one silly person," then you'd be wrong.
"What time is the 3 o'clock parade?"
Every. damn. day.
"When do you rotate the castle?"
Not one person in the history of ever had actually seen Cinderella's Castle, you know, rotate, but that didn't stop people from just knowing it did.
"How do you simulate the ride?"
This one was about the Tower of Terror. Why did people think it was a simulation? You could physically see the cars plummeting up and down as you stood in line. But here we are.
"When do y'all open the bio-dome?"
An alarming number of people thought that we controlled the weather. With a bio-dome. Built over the entirety of Disney World. That was apparently invisible. Pretty sure if you made a Venn diagram of guests who asked this question and internet conspiracy theorists, the overlap would be huge. I'm just saying.
By the way? Disney rides all have control rooms from where Cast Members monitor each attraction from start to finish. And they see everything you do. Everything.
So I really empathized with Imgur user royrogersdoublebarburger when I stumbled across his post, Tales of a Walt Disney World Life Guard, in which he posted memes of the silly-to-hilariously-dumb questions he got asked and memories he had of his three years working as a lifeguard in Recreation. Here are some of my favorites:
Maybe it's because it's "The Happiest Place on Earth," but parents seemed to think their kids were completely invulnerable to all forms of injury when at Disney. The Rec lifeguards hustled harder than any other lifeguards I knew.
So much about all amusement parks, not just Disney World, are props, built specifically for each individual attraction. They are there for show, not for you to put your child on, kick, or steal. Seriously, who steals a rock?
God bless you, Europeans. Those kids will never be the same again.
Every ride, everywhere. No matter how many times you tell guests the safety rules, someone always thinks they can ignore them. And then tears happen. And sometimes blood.
So there you go. Really, 99 percent of the guests I saw were great. As for the other 1 percent, well — at least they made for some great stories.
Do you have any crazy stories from your time at a Disney park, either as a Cast Member or a guest? I'd LOVE you to share in the comments.